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Inactive Forums => Forge Birthday Forum => Topic started by: Matt Snyder on April 05, 2006, 11:36:52 AM



Title: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 05, 2006, 11:36:52 AM
... it's always been a lot more like Rock n Roll

Greg Stafford = Miles Davis
Ron Edwards = Elvis Presley
John Wick = Paul McCartney
Jared Sorensen = John Lennon
Vincent Baker = Bob Dylan
Paul Czege = Frank Zappa
Clinton R. Nixon = Jerry Lee Lewis
Matt Wilson = David Crosby
Keith Senkowski = Keith Moon
Matt Snyder = Neil Young (natch)
Ben Lehman = John Fogerty
Emily Care Boss = Joan Baez
Luke Crane = Jimi Hendrix (Dies when he's 33; watch out b-day boy!)

Bring on some more ...


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Mark D. Eddy on April 05, 2006, 11:43:35 AM
M.J. Young = John Michael Talbot
Seth Ben-Ezra = Michael Card

Is E. Gary Gygax = Bill Haley? (With Dave Arneson as the Comets?)


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: GreatWolf on April 05, 2006, 11:55:10 AM
Seth Ben-Ezra = Michael Card

I will accept that as a high compliment.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 05, 2006, 11:59:46 AM
Michael Miller = Ian Anderson
Joshua Neuman = David Bowie


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Luke on April 05, 2006, 12:02:00 PM
Jesus fucking Christ, save me from the hippies. Fucking Jimi Hendrix my ass. Hang that hat on Ben or something.

If we're in the Wayback Machine, at least let me be Tony Iommi.

If we're going to cite our roots... Ron's fucking Ian. I'll be Jello.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 05, 2006, 12:22:29 PM
Jesus fucking Christ, save me from the hippies. Fucking Jimi Hendrix my ass. Hang that hat on Ben or something.

If we're in the Wayback Machine, at least let me be Tony Iommi.

If we're going to cite our roots... Ron's fucking Ian. I'll be Jello.

Jimi = Hippie
Tommy Iommi  != Hippie

Dude, that's some seriously fucked up rock view. Have you HEARD the Sab's lyrics ca. 1970s?

Plus, only fucking Luke Crane would NOT want to be THE GREATEST ROCK GUITARIST OF ALL TIME, BAR NONE. Jeezus!

Wait, the vegetarian DOESN'T want to be associated with hippie god Hendrix?

The mind reels, Crane!

(Also, I lied. Jimi didn't die at 33; I think he was more like 28 or 29.)


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Keith Senkowski on April 05, 2006, 12:26:22 PM
Why the fuck do I got to die too fat and too young Snyder?  Answer me that.  By that estimation I got like 3 and half years or some shit.  You bastard.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Valamir on April 05, 2006, 12:31:42 PM
Hey, at least you made the list...I gots no love at all.  By the time Matt gets to me I'll have to be Andy Gibb or Don Ho or some shit.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 05, 2006, 12:33:13 PM
Name me one better fucking rock icon who can possibly live up to the reputation of the Angry Polack.

Keith Moon? That crazy bastard used to walk around London pubs dressed up like Nazi. I believe a puppet was also involved.

When he drums, it is the sound of thunder swearing.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 05, 2006, 12:34:42 PM
Nah, this one took some thinking, but it came out just right:

Ralph Mazza = Keith Richards


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Keith Senkowski on April 05, 2006, 12:38:05 PM
Name me one better fucking rock icon who can possibly live up to the reputation of the Angry Polack.

Keith Moon? That crazy bastard used to walk around London pubs dressed up like Nazi. I believe a puppet was also involved.

When he drums, it is the sound of thunder swearing.

Well that explanation works for me.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Thunder_God on April 05, 2006, 12:39:08 PM
Hey, at least you made the list...I gots no love at all.  By the time Matt gets to me I'll have to be Andy Gibb or Don Ho or some shit.

Pffft, think of us poor people who no one even considers.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: greyorm on April 05, 2006, 12:48:59 PM
Hey, at least you made the list...I gots no love at all.  By the time Matt gets to me I'll have to be Andy Gibb or Don Ho or some shit.

No kidding. I've been around for FIVE FUCKING YEARS, and no one remembers I'm here. Bah! Hell wit' you all. I'm goin' over here and playing me some free jazz in this smoky dive. Take that, you with your rock and roll! TRUE American artform, here, yeah!


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Thor Olavsrud on April 05, 2006, 12:58:24 PM
For the non-hippies. ;)

Ron Edwards = Greg Ginn
Jared Sorensen = Glenn Danzig
Vincent Baker = Milo Aukerman
Clinton R. Nixon = H.R.
Matt Wilson = Mike Patton
Keith Senkowski = Henry Rollins
Matt Snyder = Buzz Osborne
Luke Crane = Ian MacKaye
Paul Czege = Jello Biafra
Ralph Mazza = Bob Mould
Mike Holmes = Grant Hart


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Eric J-D on April 05, 2006, 01:24:06 PM
Hey you crybabies, quit ya complainin'.  Don't wait around for these suckers to say who you are, do the rock 'n roll thing and tell THEM who you are!  <wink>

Eric


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 05, 2006, 01:45:30 PM
To all you hippie haters:  When I say you are ANY of the people on the lists above, it's as close as you'll get to worship at my house. Equating Jimi Hendrix with "dirty hippies" is sorta like going over to GreatWolf's house and telling him Jesus was a jerk.

Raven, have it your way, ya' jazz freak. You are now Ginger Baker. (That's SERIOUSLY high praise at my house.)


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Wilson on April 05, 2006, 02:29:41 PM
Why the fuck do I got to die too fat and too young Snyder?  Answer me that.  By that estimation I got like 3 and half years or some shit.  You bastard.

At least you didn't get David fucking Crosby. Puh-lease. What, Matt, are you looking through your parents' old records or what?

Is there anyone on your list who doesn't have a penis? I claim myself to be Aimee Mann.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: John Harper on April 05, 2006, 02:37:11 PM
God DAMN you, Wilson. You beat me to it. But that's okay.

I am Tom Waits.

I win, you fuckers.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Jared A. Sorensen on April 05, 2006, 03:52:02 PM
For the non-hippies. ;)

Ron Edwards = Greg Ginn
Jared Sorensen = Glenn Danzig
Vincent Baker = Milo Aukerman
Clinton R. Nixon = H.R.
Matt Wilson = Mike Patton
Keith Senkowski = Henry Rollins
Matt Snyder = Buzz Osborne
Luke Crane = Ian MacKaye
Paul Czege = Jello Biafra
Ralph Mazza = Bob Mould
Mike Holmes = Grant Hart


Glenn WISHES he was me. ie: taller than most of his female fans. ZING!

Jesus H. Chrysler...first I get called John Lennon, then Danzig. I guess you guys are still a bit steamed.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Gordon C. Landis on April 05, 2006, 04:04:30 PM
Diving in, I'll just go and pick myself - Ray Davies.  Been gone a while, and never much of a solo act.  But hoping for a bit of a comeback in my old age.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 05, 2006, 04:38:14 PM
Diving in, I'll just go and pick myself - Ray Davies.  Been gone a while, and never much of a solo act.  But hoping for a bit of a comeback in my old age.

Right on.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Valamir on April 05, 2006, 05:55:25 PM
So Matt...who gets to Burn in a Ring of Fire...?


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 05, 2006, 06:48:40 PM
Ralph, as Zappa once sang on a live album:

"The price of meat has just gone up, and your Ring of Fire has just gone down."

Veggies. BAH.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Thor Olavsrud on April 05, 2006, 06:57:27 PM
Zappa's cover of Ring of Fire on The Best Band You Never Heard in Your Life was out of this world. Also worth mention is Cash's live duet with Dylan in '69. And Social Distortion's cover, of course, to bring it back to the punk. :)


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Keith Senkowski on April 05, 2006, 08:10:26 PM
Thor,

Henry fuck'n Rollins baby!  You have just stayed your exection bitch!


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Alex F on April 06, 2006, 01:13:47 AM
Ron always struck me as the gaming embodiment of modern punk legend Damien Moyal. Every time I hear "Spinning our wheels, running in place/ If we take no chance, we can make no mistake / But how fucking cowardly" ("More Than Just Music, It's A Hairstyle") it's not just punkers I imagine getting defensive...


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Joshua A.C. Newman on April 06, 2006, 08:43:21 AM
Joshua Neuman = David Bowie

Holy fuck, that's the nicest thing anyone's said about me.

Er, assuming that's me...


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Mike Holmes on April 06, 2006, 10:35:37 AM
Thor,

Though not a fan, I accept your apparent analysis that Universalis = Husker Du.

But goddamit, I wanted to be Ozzy: has played forever, and always will, rambles on a lot, sometimes incoherently, oblivious to what others think about him, constanly makes a fool out of himself, but people still listen to him for some reason...

To avoid his ire, I'll not call Jason Blair = Vanilla Ice. But he's not eminem either? I guess we can call him Public Enemy.

Corollaries:
IF Vincent = Dylan AND Em = Baez, THEN Meg = Suze Rotolo?
IF Gygax = Bill Haley (and, yeah, Arneson is the comets then - undercredited for the real work), THEN Charles S. Roberts = Les Paul (Rickenbacker is HG Wells)
IF Paul = Zappa, THEN Knipe = Adrian Belew, AND Matt Gwinn = Steve Vai
IF Wicked Dead = Beatles, THEN Annie = George Harrison?
IF Wilson = Crosby AND Snyder = Young, THEN Tim Kelinert = Stills, AND Jonathan Walton = Nash
IF Universalis = Husker Du, THEN FATE = REM

Mike


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 06, 2006, 10:57:14 AM
Joshua Neuman = David Bowie

Holy fuck, that's the nicest thing anyone's said about me.

Er, assuming that's me...

Yeah, it's you. I KNEW I'd screw up that spelling. I had it both ways (Here and the correct version) twice. No shit!


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 06, 2006, 10:58:41 AM
IF Wicked Dead = Beatles, THEN Annie = George Harrison?
IF Wilson = Crosby AND Snyder = Young, THEN Tim Kelinert = Stills, AND Jonathan Walton = Nash

Mike

FINALLY! Somebody gets it! Rock on, Holmes.

P.S. Harrison? Sure, but no Yoko? ;)


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: GreatWolf on April 06, 2006, 11:16:17 AM
To all you hippie haters:  When I say you are ANY of the people on the lists above, it's as close as you'll get to worship at my house. Equating Jimi Hendrix with "dirty hippies" is sorta like going over to GreatWolf's house and telling him Jesus was a jerk.

My father is a pastor and he loves Hendrix.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Bryan Hansel on April 06, 2006, 11:24:37 AM
No one Sid Viscous?

Shameless self promotion:  Bryan Hansel = Jay Farrar


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Matt Snyder on April 06, 2006, 11:51:00 AM

My father is a pastor and he loves Hendrix.


Far out. Sounds exactly like my brother-in-law, who is and does the same.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Thor Olavsrud on April 06, 2006, 01:04:28 PM
Thor,

Though not a fan, I accept your apparent analysis that Universalis = Husker Du.

But goddamit, I wanted to be Ozzy: has played forever, and always will, rambles on a lot, sometimes incoherently, oblivious to what others think about him, constanly makes a fool out of himself, but people still listen to him for some reason...

There are people out there that aren't fans of Husker Du? My brain doesn't accept it, so I'll just repress that idea instead.

Anyway, the list I came up with is not just based on their (awesome) music, but also their vocal evangelization of the DIY ethos, and their roles in creating the indie labels of the late 1970s and 1980s. These are people who had, and in some cases continue to have, an incredibly important role in beginning to change the way musicians distribute and get compensated for their work.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Mike Holmes on April 06, 2006, 01:09:39 PM
Er, yah, that's what I was trying to say. It makes sense. I just wish I liked the music more. :-)

Mike


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Thor Olavsrud on April 06, 2006, 01:10:29 PM
I just wish I liked the music more. :-)

Does not compute.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Alex F on April 06, 2006, 01:58:50 PM
Thor, do you like the more recent solo-ey stuff? I say him play last year and it was un-fnkcinkg believably good. Body of Song and Last Dog and Pony Show have some great songs. That said, I'm more of a Sugar fan than Husker Du fan*, and the stuff is more toward that direction.

*Heresy? Hell, sue me. the 'Du were a bit before my time, and Sugar were the first band I saw live, way back when. No contest.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Thor Olavsrud on April 06, 2006, 06:54:55 PM
I haven't actually heard any of it. I've been meaning to check it out for ages. I sort of drifted into jazz and fusion in the 90s. Adding to list...

What do you think of Hart's solo stuff?


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Iskander on April 07, 2006, 03:37:08 AM
Thor Olavsrud = Simon Cowell.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Alex F on April 07, 2006, 06:15:44 AM
Thor: Haven't heard any. Worth a listen? Oh, if you PM me I can throw you a few tracks of Mould's to see what you think of them.
Iskander: For a while there I confused Cowell with Callow. Who, despite his coolness, is not the first person I associate with rockstardom...


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Clinton R. Nixon on April 07, 2006, 07:28:39 AM
Snyder!

"Jerry Lee Lewis?" No way.

Thor - H.R. - nice, although not me. Still, nice.

If I've got to pick, I'll go with Mark Mothersbaugh.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: talysman on April 07, 2006, 09:35:13 AM
Corollaries:
IF Vincent = Dylan AND Em = Baez, THEN Meg = Suze Rotolo?
IF Gygax = Bill Haley (and, yeah, Arneson is the comets then - undercredited for the real work), THEN Charles S. Roberts = Les Paul (Rickenbacker is HG Wells)
IF Paul = Zappa, THEN Knipe = Adrian Belew, AND Matt Gwinn = Steve Vai
IF Wicked Dead = Beatles, THEN Annie = George Harrison?
IF Wilson = Crosby AND Snyder = Young, THEN Tim Kelinert = Stills, AND Jonathan Walton = Nash
IF Universalis = Husker Du, THEN FATE = REM
If you're going to do it that way, then Ron isn't Ian Anderson (a link I don't understand...) He's Lou Reed, and Sorcerer is Velvet Underground.



Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Emily Care on April 07, 2006, 10:01:56 AM
Corollaries:
IF Vincent = Dylan AND Em = Baez, THEN Meg = Suze Rotolo?

I was gonna say Meg was Janis Joplin or Joanie Mitchell, but Suze (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suze_Rotolo) fuckin rocks.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Mike Holmes on April 07, 2006, 11:53:24 AM
Well, and see, it fits, because Meg isn't published, so she can't be a musician per the analogy...

OK, I've officially taken this too far.

Mike


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Larry L. on April 07, 2006, 12:50:09 PM
I now know more about Clinton than I once did. Pretty cool.

I think John may be on to something.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Meguey on April 09, 2006, 04:52:42 AM
Janis Joplin, yes!  Notice it's actually Big Brother and The Holding Company or the Full Tilt Boggie Band, so I think claiming a *band member* is ok for a person merely working on a game. Either Janis Joplin or Jackie McShee.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: Ron Edwards on April 09, 2006, 07:00:58 PM
Quote
Ron isn't Ian Anderson (a link I don't understand...) He's Lou Reed, and Sorcerer is Velvet Underground.

Yay-up. Zactly.


Title: Re: Fuck poetry ...
Post by: MPOSullivan on April 09, 2006, 07:49:29 PM

If you're going to do it that way, then Ron isn't Ian Anderson (a link I don't understand...) He's Lou Reed, and Sorcerer is Velvet Underground.



I always saw Sorcerer as more of an Iggy and the Stooges "Raw Power" sort of thing.  Referencing all of the earlier stuff, just like Pop did, but very much vibing on it's own and showing people how it can be done differently.  Setting the stage for the coming of punk and just having a bunch of drunken, dirty fun.  Maybe less with the smearing peanut butter on yourself/stabbing yourself with broken bottles on stage sort of thing though. 

As for me, I just want to be Greg Dulli when I grow up.