[Imp Game] Nearing the finishline, layout q's

[Tobias]

Much better, IMHO. Some remaining pointers:

Re-read for language.

I would (still) make the Terms chapter more specific to this game - fr.ex. 'Check'. And make the definition of Dungeon Master in the Terms chapter a bit less 'traditional'. (You could, for instance, compare him to the player that always does the rules-reading and explaining of boardgames to new players).

You mention both 'there is no absolute right or wrong way to play', but you also mention 'in a good game'.

Instructions on 'what to read' should not be placed so far into the text - certainly not after the pieces of text that have just been read anyway. ('Beginning a new Game')

Better feedback to the reader what he'll be reading (guidance through the text).

There is still vagueness (in order of speech, acting, etc.), but that will be a LOT clearer with the play example, because people will fill in the blanks you don't want/need to explain with their own conclusions.

[daMoose_Neo]

All right, I'm feeling really good about this draft.
Got the example dropped in, a modified version of what happened in our first playtest, partly because I forgot quite a bit of it, partly because of some minor changes in the rules between that play and the final draft.
Also restructured some of it, have the Introduction before the Play example.
I also cleared out any references to "a good game", and hopefully eliminated that dual-idea (standard for "good" vs. no one way to play).

I'll probably be reading it over another twenty times before I go to bed today, but here's the current draft:

http://www.neoproductions.net/files/mischief.pdf

[jrs]

Nate,

I did not read the text.  My comments are solely on appearance.

1. Please add page numbers.

2. Remove the elipses in the table of contents, or use "." as fill before all page numbers.  

3. The paragraph style is inconsistent.  It would look better if you fixed this.  For example, under "About the Imp Game" there is no vertical space between the 1st and 2nd paragraph, while there is a line of space between the 2nd and 3rd paragraph.  Also the initial paragraph indent varies in size, e.g., see the definitional paragraph for "Character."

4. It looks like the bulleted tabs are equivalent in length to the initial paragraph indents.  I prefer that the space after bullets be shorter than other indents or tabs.  

5. The two bulleted points, "Activating Traits" and "Raising Target Numbers," may look better as sub-headings without the bullets.

6. If you plan for this to be a printed item, make sure that there is sufficient additional white space added to the inside half of the pages.  

7. Did I mention page numbers?

Julie

[daMoose_Neo]

Updated to account Julie, thanks for a look!

1) Been waiting to add page numbers for the moment, but hey, went ahead and did it anyway. Anyone mention Word is a bitch for laying out your own page count? Massacred a formula to get it, however, and it works ^_^
2) Elipses gone

3) Isn't that the paragraph style is inconsistant, just that theres one or two that I missed in the formatting. Believe that was the last one.

4) Played with those, hope its more to your liking.

5) I think I'm going to stick with those. The sub-heading is "What you can do with these points", the bullets being what can be done. They're found under Guts Points and Praise Points actually.

6) Printing this via RPGMall's services, 4.25x5.5, RPGM recommends a 1/4 inch margin whereas I have a 1/2 internal, 1/3 exterior. I should be okay.

**Edit** Forgot to mention, the PDF may look a little odd in comparison to a print version. Printed properly, the pages will actually be on opposite sides as they are on the PDF- can tell that by the page numbers, which will fall on the external edge when printed. That might be why the margins looked wrong.

[Jasper Polane]

Nate,

I think the introduction as it is now is a little confusing, especially to new players. The reason for this is all the "in other RPGs" bits and references to traditional roleplaying that are unnecessary for playing the Imp Game.

For example, why explain what "3d10" means if the game only uses d6s?Why write "2d6" and not just "2 dice"?

If you give a description of what a GM is on page 3, and on page 6 you write that the role of GM in the Imp Game is different, this only makes it less clear what it is the GM is supposed to do.


Another point: Page 7, about Scene Framing, it doesn't really describe scene framing. It reads more like traditional "encounters" to me.

--Jasper

[Tobias]

I'm with Jasper (except on the scene framing bit, I don't have an opinion on that right now).

[daMoose_Neo]

Good point on the dice, I hadn't really thought of that. Quick fix, however, just rip the 2d6 explanation from the terms and switch all references to "two six sided dice".
GM was a similar fix. Was able to remove a handful of such references without affecting the overall blocks of text, so that works.

As per the scene framing, A) I'm not sure how else you can describe it and B) From what I can tell, the passage jives the with the glossary definition and my own use of scenes on and off stage. (...A GM-task in which many possible Techniques are used to establish when a sequence of imaginary events begins and ends, what characters are involved, and where it takes place. Analogous to a "cut" in film editing which skips fictional time and/or changes location. A necessary feature of System.)

The important point I wanted to drive through was players didn't *HAVE* to play out walking from the dungeon to town- "Let's go to town!" "Okay! So we're sitting outside town in the bushes next to the road." Is such a quick way. Elaborate and eloquent? Nope. Functional, yes. You have the location (Outside of the town, in the bushes), you have the present characters (The Imps), and they're hiding.
Major difference is scene framing, to whatever level it is used, can be performed by anyone, not just the GM (who would be doing it as a player anyway)

[Jasper Polane]

Hi Nate,

You're right, it IS difficult to explain.

From the game text:

"Scene Framing" is a technique by which you can skip entire sections of down time if you don't want or expect anything to happen,

You seem to define Scene Framing as the skipping of downtime, but the time skipping part is just a "by-product" of framing the scene. You can frame a scene set in the past (flashback), or set at the same time as the previous scene but in a different location.

The important point I wanted to drive through was players didn't *HAVE* to play out walking from the dungeon to town- "Let's go to town!" "Okay! So we're sitting outside town in the bushes next to the road." Is such a quick way.

I see what you're trying to do, and it's a good point, but I don't think the text explains it very clearly. If you're trying to make the point "Skip the boring parts, get to the fun stuff!", you don't need to go into scene definition and function.

And this bit of text:

The best time to end a scene and start a new one is when the action in game has nearly drug to a stop. At that point, anyone can take over narrating actions as usual and begin explaining what happened over the course of the span of time, leading everyone up to the new moment.

I completely disagree with it. Maybe I'm misreading you, but it seems to me you're not skipping the boring downtime here, just shortening it.

--Jasper

[daMoose_Neo]

Okay, got you now. I know what I want to say, and the text says it (I read the glossary term and the SF entry from the book as similar) to my mind, but not to yours.

Lets try this...

Like in television or theatre, use of Scenes can allow players to have action going on in several places, or times, at once. Their use in play is similar to their use in theatre: each scene consists of a time, place, characters, and can include additional details important to the action going on at the moment.

One use for scenes is to skip "downtime"; situations, such as traveling, that are not expected to contain anything interesting, engaging or "fun". Doing this can allow players to skip from one important event, such as receiving orders to raid and loot a sorcerer's tower, to the next, showing up at the tower, ready and waiting to loot it.
Another use can be to focus attention on another group of players in games where not all of the characters are together. Many of these are considered to be occurring at the same time as what happened just before, such as with "Meanwhile, back at the dungeon..." situations.
Setting up a new scene can be useful simply for keeping everyone in the game. If one or more players have exhausted their resources, setting a new scene after the characters have rested can allow the group to reset their resources while providing a reasonable explanation in game for their renewed vigor.
Finally, scenes are an excellent way to control the starting and stopping of a session or scenario. Ending a scene on a climactic note or after an important revelation can act as a cliffhanger just before a break in play, bringing the players back with more enthusiasm and excitement for what will happen next.

Any player can set up a new scene as long as none of the other players have anything else they would like to accomplish in the current scene.
The current scene should close as neatly as possible, if necessary leaving only important events or loose ends to deal with. This way, players are not entrenched with small details and can focus more on playing in the new scene than remembering little details from the last one.
To keep the game interesting, the player framing the new scene should try to give the other players as much material as possible to bring them into the new scene. He or she should introduce the location, indicate when the events take place (either how much time has passed, if the events are occurring concurrently with the previous scene or if it is a flashback), which of the characters are involved, and any important actions occurring at the moment.

[daMoose_Neo]

Its done! Its done! Its PDF Published and available! WOO!

I just wanted to get that out of my system. I was looking for a meaningful place to post something, but lacking that I realized I had this layout thread still on the first page...

Check it out ^_^ http://www.rpgnow.com/product_info.php?products_id=4760

[Jasper]

Nice to see it up! It's funny though, that there's no automatic link to the RPG.net review. You might want to talk to someone about that. -Could be because the review is filed under "The Imp Game--Mischief and Mayhem" with the double-hyphen rather than colon.

[daMoose_Neo]

Auto links up does it? Hm. Guess I will have to speak with someone!
Got it up yesterday finally (took like a week :P) before my weekly Twilight events, got back around 2 or so after seeing Revenge of the Sith, so I got press releases out and hit the sack- OFF TO THE RESEARCH CAVE!