Convention Trifold up for critique

[TonyLB]

As we enter my summer convention season, I want as many ways as possible to spread the word about Capes.

My preferred mode of contact, of course, is to get people at a table and demo the system.  But, for those who won't put in that amount of time, I figured I'd put together a trifold flyer to try to drag them back to either the demo table or the website.  I've got the Interior and Exterior up for people to critique.

One of the things that I can't really tell is whether I should be playing up the ways that it's similar to standard roleplaying games, or the ways that it is different from standard roleplaying games.  

My current take on it is "Yeah, it's different, for good and solid reasons of game design... here's what it accomplishes as a result."  But I get the feeling (from an obviously imperfect self-editing viewpoint) that it comes across as somewhat defensive... more "Don't criticize me!  I meant to do this!" than "Here's what I meant to do, I hope it interests you."

[Eric Provost]

Hiya Tony,

Been reading over your trifold.  It seems a bit negative and defensive.  If I read this trifold at the con without knowing anything about Capes in advance, I'd pass.  Mostly because reading the trifold would make me assume that more people are saying bad things about the game than good things.

Is Capes really an RPG?
Play it and find out.

Gotta tell ya' Tony.  That sucks.  I say, toss that whole entry on it's ear.  Don't even give the trifold reader the thought that anyone even considers Capes to not be an RPG.  You know it's an RPG, so tell the reader about the RPG, not that some people have called it's status into question.

The whole GM-less play thing needs some polishing I think.  I can see that you want to tell people who are hung up on GMs how cool no-GM play can be, but I don't think you're getting that across.  Why not tell your prospective buyer how, in Capes, everyone has an opportunity to create setting, conflict, and character on an equal footing?  In your shoes, I wouldn't even mention the lack of GMs at all.  Doing so tells us what Capes isn't, instead of what Capes is.

May I suggest playing up the unified conflict resolution system?  I may be a little biased, that is the hook that got me to buy DitV, but I think that there are plenty of gamers out there that are so frustrated with task resolution systems that a system that allows them a little personal authority over social conflicts will be a huge draw.  I wouldn't mention how you can use it to win a girlfriend for your character.  That eeks onto scary-crazy ground for people who haven't come to the conflict resolution side of the fence.  What I would mention is anything I could remember from my task resolution days that was particularly frustrating.  But still without directly comparing it to other games.

Maybe something like;

The conflict resolution system in Capes can handle any conflict that two characters might get into.  You can say that Dr. FastFoot is ten times faster than Lady Flash.  And prove it.  Want to convince Professor Braniac to donating a new wing to the Center for Youth Mutants?  Capes has that covered.

I hope this is coming across as constructive.  That's my intention anyway.

More positive, less negative Tony.  It's a great game.  No need to tell everyone what it isn't.

-Eric

[Lisa Provost]

I read your flyer and I can tell you, I don't think it would make me buy your game if I didn't already have a copy at home. :)

First off... it's too long.  At a con, you want people to come to your product and come quickly.  I was at Origins this past week and I can tell you, I still have flyers in my bag that I haven't read yet because they were too long!  I wasn't going to waste precious gaming or shopping time at a con to read a flyer!  The ones that were quick and concise drew my attention.   Something small.  Something they can read in under a minute.  

I think you also focus too much on what it isn't rather than on what it is.  This seems like you are down-playing your own game!  

You want to draw them to your game? Hand them a pre-made charater that you put together and invite them to a demo for a few minutes.  You can tell them that you have a game where they can make a kick ass character in under five minutes.  I guarantee more than a few will say "Really?  How?"  Then you've got them.  (My years in sales catching up with me.)  ;)

If I were you, I'd take that first paragraph on the interior fold, put that great pic under it, toss the rest and I'd say you're done!

[Lisa Provost]

One thing I forgot to mention:

I would say don't compare your game to other games.  All it's going to make me do is think about that other game.  Especially if I am already familiar with that other game.  

All games have similarities.  All have differences.  I say you should just focus on what your game is.

Okay, I think I'm done.  :)

[TonyLB]

Thank'ya much, folks!  That gives me a solid direction to go with (not to mention a well-deserved kick in the seat of the pants to get over my defensiveness).  Very helpful!

[Eric Provost]

Keep us updated Tony.  We want to see any updated versions.

-Eric

[TonyLB]

Will do.  Newest updates:  Interior and Exterior.

[Eric Provost]

And for "entertain", of course, you should read "torture."

That bit made me smile, think of my other players, and how much fun we'd have fucking with each other.  It's perfect.

And you used my copy.  I'm downright blushing.  Without threat of patting myself on the back even a little bit, I have to say I think the "Conflict is Conflict" section is great.  It really says what the conflict resolution system is all about.

I think maybe there's just the one thing left hanging.  The bit Lisa kind of half-mentioned.  Getting someone to read it.  I don't remember where it came from, but there's wisdom out there that says you've got something like five seconds to get someone's attention.  Those five seconds pass without interest and your trifold becomes a bookmark.  At best.

I think I've got at least half a dozen flyers and even full catalogues and magazines from Origins that never even got a glance.  Someone thrust it into my hand as I was walking by.  It was only out of politeness that I didn't drop it all into the nearest trash bin.  

So... How are you going to get people to actually read your trifold if they don't have time for a five-minute demo?

I'm trying to think of one or two sentences you could spout off to someone as they're passing by with fleeting interest as you press a trifold into their hand.  A question.  It can't be a yes or no answer, because that doesn't take enough brain power to stop someone in their tracks.  I wish I had a little more history with the four-color comics.  I got into manga real early.  But, I hope you'll forgive my 4-color ignorance as I present this example;

Hey, ya' remember that time when Superman and Lex Luthor were having that argument about that thing?  Luthor got his ass kicked but stood up laughing?  Do you think it would have been more fun to play the ass-kicking Superman or the laughing Luthor in that scene?

-Eric

[TonyLB]

Glad you like it better!  I'm much happier with it too, mostly due to the on-target feedback you guys provided.

As for getting people who aren't interested a'tall... Yeah... that's a hard one for me.  I do a much better job with even sixty seconds to demo a fragment of system.  I like your idea of a question, though... something nice and tight and punchy, like Vincent's "He's going to go kill the woman that slept with his son, you're standing in his path, now what do you do?"  Except, honestly, I like your multiple choice version better, because Vincent's tends to make people go "Uh... drrr... I d'know...."  Or maybe that was just me.  The multiple choice lets people voice their snap judgment.

Something like "Y'know the end of the X-Men movie when Magneto says 'You know I'll get out' and Patrick Stewart says 'And I'll be waiting.'  Who won that exchange?"

Me, personally?  I think Magneto, hands down.  Magneto wins all their exchanges (except "I feel a great swell of pity for the man who comes to that house looking for trouble"...that's a TKO line if ever I heard one).  But other people can reasonably interpret the data differently.

[Eric Provost]

Exactly.  Get the passersby to start thinking about comics.

But.

I'm gonna lean back toward my example a bit.  The one where Superman kicks ass and Luthor laughs.  Two reasons.  The first is that it's a classic scene from any superhero & supervillain matchup.  Batman kicks Joker's ass and Joker laughs ('course, he always laughs).  Spiderman kicks Green Goblin's ass and Goblin laughs.  Over and over you see it happen.  So, when you mention that scene, everyone who likes comic figures has seen some version of that scene.

The second reason is to illustrate something you can get from Capes that other games can't really give you; A reason to giggle with glee at the foolishness of your opponent when you've just had your ass handed to you.  In Capes, Luthor's player laughs at Superman's player because Luthor's player just gained a bucket of power for getting his ass handed to him.  Now Luthor's player can reveal that Superman has been wasting his time in the ass-kicking and no longer has the time to stop the bomb that threatens Jimmy Olson's life.  And he can back it up with the system.

That's why it's just as fun to play the laughing villain as it is to play the ass-kicking hero and that's why someone should pick up and play Capes.

-Eric

p.s.  I'm totally going on actual play threads and what I remember from your design notes for my Capes examples.  I picked up my copy at Origins but haven't gone through it yet.

[Valamir]

And you used my copy. I'm downright blushing. Without threat of patting myself on the back even a little bit, I have to say I think the "Conflict is Conflict" section is great. It really says what the conflict resolution system is all about.

Good copy, except he also copied the typo.

Should be "to donate" or "into donating"

[Sydney Freedberg]

Yeah, that's pretty neat.

As a systems junkie, I'd love a few more teasing hints dropped about the mechanics: not just the Exemplars bit, but something about Story Tokens and winning-by-losing as well. I suspect a lot of convention-goers will be systems junkies as well, frankly.

Oh, and the "reviewer" blurbs on the back seem a little "this is kinda weird, but..." As if they're your Mom telling you to eat your Brussells Sprouts or something (and I love Brussells Sprouts). Maybe something more unashamedly gushing? At least for the first of the three.

[TonyLB]

I'm very fond of the reviewer quotes, all of which say (to my mind) "Capes is not cool in any of the ways you're expecting... it is, however, very cool.  Cool in an entirely new denomination."

Now see, me, I'd take one look at that and say "Damn!  They went out and picked people who have concerns about the system, and even those people are telling me that the system's worth a look.  That's both gutsy and revealing."

Which is my justification for doing it by fiat, rather than my opening salvo in an argument about whether or not it's right.  My intuition is telling me in no uncertain terms that the guardedly positive quotes are the right way to go.

I feel bad saying that, because I don't like to shut down people who have (a) my best interests at heart and (b) the better intellectual argument.  But I've only got one intuition that's my very own, and I've learned to respect it, inconstant as it is.