character idea

[Krammer]

So I have been thinking of making a character, but im not sure if it would work, so I would like some feedback on it.

The character was just a normal guy from Ehld. He was one of the 'Defenders' (it explains them in the book). Well, his village/town/place that he lived in got attacked, and he lost just about everything, including the woman he was to marry (does that sound too cliche?)
  After that happens, he goes off to get revenge. He journeys deep into the jungles of Savari (or was it Svarastra? whichever one had the jungles) in search of the one who did all this. While there he stumbles upon ancient ruins, and gets lost inside of them, as they are like a labrynth. eventually he finds out that the one who he was looking for lived in the ruins, and he finally faces him. they fight, and my character loses horribly, and gets a curse put on him.
   the curse is similar to the one outlined OBAM, where each night the character turns into a wild animal. I think it was called lut garou, or something. Well, I thought it would be hard to have a character that is an animal at night, so i tweaked it to be like the curse in Ladyhawk, if any of you have seen it. He bound to another character, who during the day is a raven, but in the evening, he is an unseelie.
  The way I planned to use this character is use the normal guy during the day, and the unseelie during the night. I plan to introduce him/them in an upcoming campaign, where they will have to go into the ruins for personal reasons, and they will run into my new character. Of course, I plan to have the unseelie character be loyal to the bad guy, so it would add a lot of flavor to the campaign.
  Im not sure if it would all work out right, so if I could get your feedback, that would be nice.

[6inTruder]

The character was just a normal guy from Ehld. He was one of the 'Defenders' (it explains them in the book). Well, his village/town/place that he lived in got attacked, and he lost just about everything, including the woman he was to marry (does that sound too cliche?)

Stop right there. This is where a lot of your character's drama is. You can even work your curse in here, though I think it's a little over the top.

More important: who is this guy? Does he have a name even? It may seem obvious, but what's he all about? Revenge stories have been done, but that doesn't invalidate them as character ideas.

[Valamir]

Excellent advice 6.

The rest of the back ground sounds alot like playing before play begins.

If you want your guy to hunt through the jungles, find an ancient ruins, locate his enemy and fight him, then work with your GM to make this happen through your actual play and make the jungle and ruins a feature of the campaign.

If its completely incompatable with what the other players want to do, then consider setting the idea aside and saving it for a future opportunity.

[Krammer]

Thanks for the advice, guys.

I suppose I should have done a little more explaining.

He does have a name. I have no idea why I didn't mention it earlier. It's Redd Endalton. Does that sound like a good name? Well, anyhow....
I should have mentioned that the his girl was not killed, but kidnapped. THe reason for this is that the kidnapping was actually bait, luring Redd into the ruins. I didn't mention this earlier, but a part of the curse was that Redd was to stay in the ruins forever, as a sort of guardian, and the Unseelie was there to make sure he did his job.(I'm still working on a name for the Unseelie). So the girl was bait because the bad guy (for whom I am also tryign to get a good name) wanted Redd to be one of the people that guards his domain. I suppose I should have mentioned that there were lots of people in the ruins that were sort of guardians, but they were all mindless people, sort of, as Redd would become if he were to stay in there long enough.
  Well, anyhow, as much as I would like to have a GM paly through my characters past, I'm afraid I won't. THe reason being that the players in my upcoming campaign are going to go through similar stuff (you know, going through the ruins and all that crap) and it would get kind of tedious to repeat(possibly, although it could turn out rather interesting to see how different the methods would be.) And since my gaming group takes turns on who is seneschal, it would give away how my campaign will be. ('course it would give it away if any of them read this post, but most of them rarely visit the Forge)
   Lets see, anything else to explain?
    Perhaps If I were to tell you his spiritual attributes, then that would let you know a bit more about the character.

  Destiny- Be rid of his curse
  Passion- Loyalty to the Unseelie he is bound to (anybody got a good name for it?)
  Passion- Hatred towards the man that cursed him (again, names?)
  Luck- ...
  Drive- I dont remember this one and I'm too lazy to go find my character sheet....

 And of course, the little unseelie has his own spiritual attributes.

  Destiny- Not sure yet, but I'll get one.
  Passion- Still loyal to the darkness
  Drive- Will do anything to cause trouble
  Passion- Loves to see others be unhappy
  Luck- I like luck...

  Well, I think Ive rambled on a bit too much there....

[Rico]

rarely visit the forge eh? Well I already knew that much about your character and campain anyways...but I can tell that it will be fun.

But first we must finish mine...

[Ingenious]

In a response to Valamir's comment, let me remind everyone that playing out your character's pasts is a tedious thing to do, some groups might not get together long enough in a session to do this, so the first two or 3 sessions might be just BACKGROUND and therefore can be done online, through emails etc etc etc. Like my character, Stanislav(who is mentioned is ZazielsRephaim's post on the first session/recap) his background involved something that still haunts him to this day... his father's foolish strategic moves.. etc etc. To have role-played this would be folly. As A. Large battles and scalability of any sort is news to me(to be released in TFOB I beleive) and B. That SINGLE battle might have taken up our entire 9pm to 8am session. Not to mention his past of going into exhile in the wilderness for YEARS.

With that addressed... you seem to have this character idea under control.  I'd just like to mention that I hope this guy doesn't turn into a mindless zombie quickly.. and another idea and plot twist I'd rather e-mail you about because I wouldn't want to spoil it for your friends who also seem to lurk here.

-Ingenious
e-mail is coryvigdal@yahoo.com in case you want to hear my storyline ideas....

[Brian Leybourne]

Ralph wasn't suggesting playing out the characters past. He was saying that all the cool shit you have decided is "background" might be more fun to play in the "foreground". Not so much playing the characters history, but making it the characters now.

Brian.

[Ingenious]

Well then, I stand.. errr sit, corrected.
I thought he implied that he thought that not playing out a character's past that has to deal with him being half-magical was the wrong move. Implying further that he assumed that this person might be just setting his background to gain some advantageous position and not have to role-play to get it. I.e. the syndrome of 'I got it from a previous campaign, or I got it playing a scenario with my brother' or what-not.

*shrug*
That's english for ya, anything said or written can be construed in an infinute number of interpretations.

-Ingenious

[Krammer]

Well, as much as I would like to play out the background, I wont.
For some reason i think i posted this already but i cant find it, but the reason i wont is because it would be too repetitive. Much of the stuff that the player will be doing in my upcoming campaign, is the same as what happens in my background, only that it will be focused less on my character and more on theirs, and some of the events will be built around the player's character's backgrounds.

     er, yeah