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Dumb GNS jokes

Started by Michael S. Miller, April 05, 2004, 10:10:48 AM

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Scourge108

A gamist, a narrativist, and a simulationist encounter a hostile group of cannibals while hiking through the rain forest, and decide to use their roleplaying skills to get out of the situation.  

The Narrativist goes first, using his skills to present the moral dilemma to the cannibals.  "We are all human.  If you eat me, how does that make it any better than if I eat you?  At what cost to your soul does this practice come?"  Unimpressed, the cannibals tied him up and threw him in the pot.

The Gamist went next.  "It's all about who's the best," he shouted, and leapt into combat, using all the maneuvers and tactics he'd learned from gaming.  Being seasoned hunters, the cannibals easily subdued him, tied him up, and threw him in the pot, too.

"Quick, Mr. Sim," the captives screamed, "simulate something that will let you escape and get help!"  After thinking it over, he knew exactly what kind of character to simulate.

"Hi, I'm a gourmet chef, and it looks like you nice cannibal-people could use my services!"
Greg Jensen

Anonymous

Clearly somebody in that party needed the skill "Eat spicy food".

(this is joke that only Clinton will get)

Scourge108

Why did the Gamist cross the road?
--For extra experience points.

Why did the Narrativist cross the road?
--What does it really mean to cross a road?  Do you cross a road, or does the road cross you?

Why did the Simulationist cross the road?  
--They were railroaded into it.
Greg Jensen

Lance D. Allen

Q. Why did the Gamist cross the road?

A. To show off his Boots of Road-crossing +5

Q. Why did the Narrativist cross the road?

A. Because it was thematically appropriate as a metaphor for the changes in his life.

Q. Why did the Simulationist cross the road?

A. Because it was the road less crossed.
~Lance Allen
Wolves Den Publishing
Eternally Incipient Publisher of Mage Blade, ReCoil and Rats in the Walls

Nicolas Crost

Why did the Narrativist cross the road?

I don't know, but if you answer that question, you will definitely get theme!

edit: Whoops, this is a thread from last year isn't it... shame on me... :-/

Doug Ruff

Q: Why did the Gamist cross the road?

A: So he could Step On Up on to the opposite kerb.
'Come and see the violence inherent in the System.'

Doug Ruff

Sorry, double post, but I've got a joke scenario I'd like you to finish.

A Gamist, a Simulationist and Narrativist find an old lamp in a basement, and one of them decides to give it rub.
'Come and see the violence inherent in the System.'

Lord_Steelhand

A Gamist, a Narritivist, and a Simulationist are out in the woods on a hike when they are forced to seek shelter in a cave to avoid rain.  Inside the cave is a dead moose carcass.  Ignoring the stench, they settle down to rest for the night and run a small game.

The Gamist begins his game and after a few hours, the Simulationist can no longer accept the disdain for genre and the realism of the world the Gamist is working in - he leaves the cave to get away from the game.

A few hours later, he is joined by the Narritivist.  "I just couldn't stand that game any longer," exclaimed the Narrativist and explained how there was no protaginization and no premise to address.  Two two of them huddle beneath a tree to wait out the night.

A few hours later they hear a noise and assume it is the Gamist.  Turning to tell him to go away, they instead see the dead hulk of the moose fleeing the cave.  Surprised, they rush back to the cave to check on their Gamist pal.  When they arrive, he is fine but miffed as he puts away his GM screen.

"What happened," they asked their pal, "Why did the dead Moose just run out of here?"

"That Moose is a wimp," shouted the bitter Gamist, "I only threw 30 orcs at him and BOOM - off he went!"

<rimshot>
Judd M. Goswick
Legion Gaming Society

Lord_Steelhand

A Gamist, a Narrativist, and a Simulationist are all in a car wreck and go to the Pearly Gates.  St Peter explains that heaven's rewards are based on a character creation system.  The gamers smile and begin work on their character sheets.

The Simulationist hands in a sheet with an angel in classic style with a backstory pulled from Milton and lots of traditional angelic powers.  St Pete reads it over and stamps it approved.  The Simulationist is transformed into his character and enters Heaven.

The Gamist spends several hours creating a carefully-balanced and min-maxed character who is an Arch-Angel Protector prestige class loaded down with treasure, influence, and magic items.  St Pete looks over the sheet, stamps it approved.  The Gamist transforms and strides into heaven to meet his loyal troops.

The Narrativist sadly hands St Pete his sheet.  St Pete stares at amazement and shock at what he sees.  "This means, my son, that you will be a Demon of the Pit – that you will be condemned to Hell!  But why?"

Looking at the cloud he's standing on in a shamed way, the Narrativist kicks up some vapor and shrugs, "They have all the best ISSUES..."
Judd M. Goswick
Legion Gaming Society