I am struggling to write engaging bangs. I tried my best for this morning's session, with results shown below.

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Game System - Alternity, modified a bit for Stakes Resolution, using IRC. A typical session runs 2 hours, and we can do 2-3 full scenes.

Setting - Psychedelic sci-fi; in this adventure, the land of the Space Amish, who preserve 20th Century lifestyles.

Themes - Varied. In this case, "Does technology weaken social cohesiveness?"

Social Stuff - We're gaming friends on-line who shoot the breeze enough to be friendly with each other. We don't know each other off-line.

Theoretical Level - I know the basic Forge stuff, and am struggling to apply it. The players don't know it explicitly.

The Protagonists
Cyborg Martin Luther King
Style - Idealistic rabblerousing fugitive.
Longterm Goals - Bring peace to the solar system.
Nemesis - Evil clone of Carl Jung (far off stage these days)
Capsule History - Ten years ago he unwittingly helped Mutant Hitler commit genocide; his friend, the Carl Jung clone, induced amnesia to bury the guilt, but now he is trying to make the worlds better places, while coping with repressed memories.

Augmented Dirty Harry
Style - Hard-nosed ex-cop, tenacious as hell
Longterm Goals - Revenge for his sister's murder.
Nemesis - Corrupt Chief of Police, who framed him.
Capsule History - Framed by Chief of Police for murdering his own sister. Though raised Space Amish, he has undergone surgical modifications. He has killed those who were directly responsible for his sister's death; they indicated that the Chief put them up to it.

Transhuman Everyman
Style - The most socially and intellectually flexible man alive
Longterm Goals - ???
Nemesis - Sentient Robo-Trashheap that lives in the Sun
Capsule History - A nomadic techno-scavenger, hustler, and entrepeneur.
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I have no idea if what I have labelled as "Bangs" really are Bangs, but they were intended as such. Naturally since I do not know what I'm doing, I'm open to advice.

Hook - Due to long-standing plot complications the heroes have wound up at the Land of the Space Amish, where it turns out a lot of old troubles are at work.

Bang 1 - Cyber-MLK discovers that the woman giving the guided tour is his Wife, who doesn't remember him. She seems kind of Prozac'y and drugged... and has married the Space Amish Leader, who, the heroes know, is involved in a conspiracy with Mutant Hitler.

Reaction 1 - "Whoa! Man, that's screwed up! Does she react to me? No? Um, okay, I guess I'm going to play it cool then. G'bye for now!"

Bang 2 - Augmented Dirty Harry looks up his dead Sister's Husband. He is addicted to drugs sold by one of A.D.H.'s criminal contacts--the Crimelord is now protecting A.D.H.'s kin from the police chief, and raising the children as his own.

Reaction 2 - "Man! That's a messed up family situation! I'm mad as hell about it. Um, but I guess I will explain my displeasure, and see what happens."

Bang 3 - The Crimelord wants ADH's help to assassinate the Chief of Police. The trick is, if you kill the Chief of Police, the Space Amish Leader will collapse, and the Space Amish Society will fade away, replaced by modern 24th Century lifestyle.

Reaction 3 - "This crimelord is untrustworthy! But I guess I will take him up on his offer, and try to turn the tables on him later."

Bang 4 - Turns out the Crimelord is getting help from the Robo-Trashheap (enemy of the Transhuman Everyman). The heroes have tangled with that guy before.

Reaction 4 - "I knew these guys couldn't be trusted. I'd like to undermine them, but I don't actually want to do anything yet. Let's bide our time and talk amongst ourselves some more about what we should do."

Bang 5 - Wife requests lunch with Cyber-MLK, announces that she now knows about his history, and that she too was brainwashed by Evil Carl Jung into forgetting her past. She has also been abused by her Space Amish Leader. She announces that if she ever leaves the Space Amish place, Carl Jung will kill the daughter she had with MLK. She is also pregnant.

Reaction 5 - "Whoa, that is pretty heavy! Dang! Um, let's urge her to help us overthrow her Space Amish Leader, but not go much further."

Bang 6 - Dirty Harry finds out that the Brother-in-Law is almost suicidal with despair over his situation, and tries to sell out ADH, the Crimelord, and the others to the Chief of Police providing he will look after the kids.

Reaction 6 - "Jeez! That's pretty intense. Now what do I do? Hmm, umm, uh... Let's sit on our hands some more."

Bang 7 - Transhuman Everyman, investigating the Trashheap's regional headquarters, discovers that it is stocked with Programmable City tubes: nano-goo that will flow all over the Space Amish Place and rebuild it into a posthuman hellscape.

Reaction 7 - "Hmm, let's cut a deal with the Trashheap's Ambitious Teenage Sidekick to pay his way through college if he will help us."
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Were any of these Bangs? If not, why not? And how can I improve on them next time?

I love the color, by the by; is Alternity really that personal, or is it just your setting?

As for the bangs; all of those seem fine in that regard. Nothing to worry about.
For application: make sure that the consequences of action are felt also if the choice the players make is one of doing nothing. Many of those reactions are very passive, so you should makes sure to protagonize the character choices regardless. When a bang hits the table, something should happen even if the players opt to do nothing. If you teach the players to assume that doing nothing gives them a pass from the sticky situation, then that's what they'll be doing, at least if they think that not getting entangled = good. For starters, start doing bangs where the most drastic course of events is obviously predicated on the character doing nothing. That way the players may feel more inclination to act before it's too late.

For example, what happened after reaction 6? Did the Brother-in-Law sell out everybody? If not, why not? Or reaction 5? Was the Wife satisfied with it, or did she insist on more commitment? Or reaction 4? Was there consequences for helping Robo-Trashheap?

Eero Tuovinen wrote: I love the color, by the by; is Alternity really that personal, or is it just your setting?

For application... start doing bangs where the most drastic course of events is obviously predicated on the character doing nothing. That way the players may feel more inclination to act before it's too late.