Yesterday some old friends came by my place, and we decided to play a session of Elfs, by Ron E. I had a printed copy, and had read it once the day before. I pitched it to them as a 'simple game of murder and larcency', and told them that they wouldn't have to roleplay if they didn't feel like it -- they could just be themselves, so to speak. They liked that.

Tim is the best roleplayer of the bunch. He is too laid-back to care about rules minutiae, and he genuinely likes to find unusual and humorous solutions to obstacles put in his (characters) way. He played Lytria, an oral, ego-tripping bimbo (S:3, LC: 2, DL:2).

André is the guy who always play guys who skulk in the shadows, always looks out for himself, and never takes one for the team. He played Cassius, a genital sadomasochist (S:1, LC:4, DL:4).

And Tom is the guy who's clinically incapable of agreeing with the GM, always ruleslawyering and looking for a free ride. On the other hand, he seldom min-maxes. He played Sleazy, an anal, unpleasant bum (S:3, LC: 2, DL:2).

As I had virtually no prep, I ran the supplied starting adventure 'Ice & Fire'.

High points from the adventure:

* The team instantly antagonizing half of the tribe by acting just as arrogantly as Tobias.

* Lytria and Cassius double-teaming the chieftains daughter in her quarters.

* Deciding to explore the castle in the middle of the night 'so these losers won't try to follow us and steal OUR treasure!'

* Beating the hell out of three Ice Elfs when attempting to sneak up the stairs, killing one. (Said Ice Elfs wanted to beat *them* up for being a$$#01es)

* Jumping through one of the mirrors that leads to the Fire Creatures and instantly attacking them (well, Sleazy did.)

* Lytria calming the incensed fire creatures by sucking her swordhandle in a most suggestive manner.

* Going back down to retrieve Tobias, they encounter two other Ice Elfs who questions them about their dead and KO'ed buddies. Lytria and Cassius spin a yarn about how they're too weak to drag the massive amounts of treasure down the stairs, and these guys (the KO'ed ones) tried to kill and rob them. 'If you'll help us, we can split the treasure!'

* They then trade the two boneheads in for the pipe, and one spell each. Case closed.

There were a few problems and snags here and there, but most of those arose from my imperfect mastery of the rules. I did note that:

* People tend to underestimate Dumb Luck. I solved that problem by doing two things: 1) Coaching the players i.e. providing concrete examples in play, and 2) being very strict with the use of Low Cunning. That means not giving players the bonus if they use it to perform actions that are even *slightly* repetitive. 1. round: 'I smack him on the left ear, really hard!'. 'OK, sounds like Low cunning.' 2. round: 'This time I smack him hard on the right ear!'. 'Straight Spunk, spud'.

* Once people have learned the basics -- NO takebacks on statements!

* Genital Elfs tend to just hit on their compatriots, and seldom goes long without gettin' some.

* Tom was very disappointed that I wouldn't let Sleazy kill the others, and lamented the lack of rules for PC death. He was also annoyed with the fact that you can't steal from your teammates in the first session. This isn't a real problem, but considering how anti-social Elfs are, perhaps some more explicit dying-rules could be useful.

But overall it was very pleasant. It even brought a few smidgeons of roleplaying out of Tom and André, and that happens only once in a blue moon. Plus, the fights were wonderfully detailed and heroic -- so detailed in fact that more mainstream systems actually seems congested because the plentitude of rules locks you down.

And Elfs is fun. We laughed a lot while playing it, so I would say that it's a success. Even with my friends, which makes it an unqualified success! :^)

Hi there,

Oh my ... God. Who wrote this obviously offensive, juvenile, vicious-minded piece of tripe game?

(And who would ask money for it?? At a site like this one?)

Thanks for playing! I have always thought Elfs to be under-appreciated, and I still await the day when people start generating their own scenarios from old D&D and modern D20 modules.

I might be reading something into your prose, but do I detect a slight similarity between the characters and their respective players? Remarkable. Elfs as gut-level wish-fulfilment.

PC death is not impossible in Elfs, I suppose. I'd use "Prince Valiant" or "Castle Falkenstein" logic - if they get waxed entirely in circumstances that pretty much suggest "death," then they die. So if an elf has no Spunk left and fails a roll (ie only using Low Cunning or Dumb Luck), and if the circumstances are pretty fatal (eg a fellow PC is cutting the elf's throat, the elf is falling into a volcano, etc) ... then death ensues. But that would be one of those Social Contract things to discuss beforehand, for sure.

I agree entirely about the combat system. For my money, it's one of the most satisfying combat systems around, and generates a huge amount of detail with very rapid and group-participatory mechanics.

Best,
Ron

Ron Edwards wrote:
I might be reading something into your prose, but do I detect a slight similarity between the characters and their respective players? Remarkable. Elfs as gut-level wish-fulfilment.

Ron Edwards wrote: Oh my ... God. Who wrote this obviously offensive, juvenile, vicious-minded piece of tripe game?

and I still await the day when people start generating their own scenarios from old D&D and modern D20 modules.

Let me guess. Castle Greyhawk?

That will be amusing, if redundant.

Good guess, but no cigar. No intern, either.

Another hint: it's also a classic that was reprinted/revamped this past year (and that's all you're getting out of me! ;D ).

I wasn't aware Castle Greyhawk was only available as a section of itself for years? And BTW, fill me in, why would Castle Greyhawk be redundant? I'm not certain I understand what you mean (you see, I've never seen a copy of that module, so I know diddly squat about it).

I thought you meant a classic that was only available as an impish parody of itself for many years. That would be Castle Greyhawk in a nutshell.

Hi Grex,

Seth and Raven seem to be conducting their own brand of "wait wait don't tell me," but while that's going on, I have another question for you: did the players get involved in the plight of Manly Mighty-Spear? I've found my play of that scenario to be sharply divided into two camps, depending on whether they do or don't.

Best,
Ron

Ron Edwards wrote: I have another question for you: did the players get involved in the plight of Manly Mighty-Spear? I've found my play of that scenario to be sharply divided into two camps, depending on whether they do or don't.