Bah. Enough with that stale "Knight vs. Samurai" bit.

Who wins in a fight between a Ninja and a Pirate?

A Pirate has more flare so I'd say that they would win. But then again Ninjas can have katana's and as we all know katanas can cut the very fabric of reality. They also flip out and kill people at the drop of a hat, but then again Pirates can drink pornographic amounts of rum.

It's a tough call really, I'd say Pirate though.

The Munchkin!

Depends. Which one's a robot?

MonkeyWrench wrote: A Pirate has more flare so I'd say that they would win. But then again Ninjas can have katana's and as we all know katanas can cut the very fabric of reality.

Pirates can drink pornographic amounts of rum.
It's a tough call really, I'd say Pirate though.

murazor wrote: Actually, they can't have katanas. They'd have ninjatos, which have nowhere near the awsome supremeness of a true katana.

NO WAY!

Ninjas are sweet

see here if your still not sure
http://www.realultimatepower.net/

Late,
Jester

Well, the answer here is quite simple to deduce..

First we take the most recent Pirate movie.

Then we take the most recent Ninja movie.

You'll have to excuse my memory on the latter, but the most recent Ninja movie I remember was Beverly Hills Ninja.. and of course the most recent Pirate movie is Pirates of the Caribbean.

Now, we compare their box office sales..

I think that it would be safe to say that Pirates killed Beverly Hills Ninja hands down.

Pirates win. Next debate?

There is no way that Pirates of the Caribbean, with its Liberal-French Loving-Johhny Dep ass actor in it beats out the incredible acting abilities of Christoper Farley as the White ninja.

Chris Farley is a comic genius, who dies way too early...a testament to the torture he was willing to put his body through to make us laugh.

dumass drug addict...I wonder if he would have been as funny if he wasn't an addict.

But I digress.

Box office sales are not all there is to a movie. I bet there are more die hard fans of Beverly Hills Ninja then there will ever be of Pirates.

Late,
Jester

I doubt that there are more die hard fans of Beverly Hills Ninja than either Pirates of the Carribbean.. simply because I beleive there was a movie previous to this new one.. otherwise the inspiration was just from either a book or some ride at Disneyland/Disneyworld.

Wolfen is correct in his box office sales point. Only in the fact that more people saw the new Pirates movie as compared to Beverly Hills Ninja.

Also, Farley died from death by speedball(overdose).. exactly like his comedic idol Belushi, of Blues-Brothers and SNL fame. It was not necessarily his death, or his drug use.. that is a testament of what he was willing to do with his body to make us laugh.. that can be seen through his antics as a comedian/his comedic genious(just had to reclarify your statement jester).

Box office sales are indeed not all what a movie makes. Many people can go to see a movie and make it the best performing movie of all time in terms of box office sales.. but if it is terrible enough, there will be no repeat business of those people that saw it originally... repeat business such as rentals, dvd's and vhs sales.. etc.

And yet again we go to the movies and hollywood's idea of reality to prove a point.. which is actually funny because it does not. If we go off of what the movies show us.. by taking the Last Samurai as a source of information.. we can say that a samurai is better than a ninja.. and we can therefore say that if a ninja is better than a Pirate, then a Samurai is better than a pirate. But if a pirate is better than a ninja, then we would have to resolve pirate vs samurai.

Regardless of that line of thinking Hollywood makes no difference in arguing this topic one way or the other. I could take a loan and make a movie that could be along the lines of the Last Samurai.. and modify it so that in the ending scene.. the bullets just bounce off of them and they slaughter the entire army. Now, is that realistic? Is it historical? NO.
Take everything you see in the theatre or on t.v. with a grain of salt. Hell, a ton of salt if it's really some horrible bullshit like anything that comes out of the mouth of ANY liberal politician. Such as ANY democrat presidential candidate left in this country.

Now back to reality, as we can best describe it.
A ninja's advantages are agility, concealment, and steath.
A pirate's advantages are body odor, the cutlass, and possibly fire-arms like early pistols.
A ninja's disadvantages are, no armor, and sometimes are lightly armed.. they wouldn't be a force strong enough against a knight for sure.
A pirate's disadvantages are speed, amputation(when applicable), level of intoxication, no armor, etc.

Take the different situations that you might see this fight in.
A ninja would win definutely during the night, in a dark alleyway.. etc.
A pirate would win during the day, especially during the day on a ship(more balanced on a ship.. the whole notion of 'sea legs', if the ocean/sea is turbulent)

At least, those are my opinions. But really, who cares about who would win historically... figure it out in the game instead.
-Ingenious

When analysing the effectiveness of a ninja versus a pirate, one must first narrow down the broad categorizations of what these combatants truly represent.

To begin with, the term pirate is a broad term typically applied to one who steals ships and cargo from vessels plying the high seas. Is the pirate a phoenician outlaw raiding carthaginian merchants? Is the pirate an armed member of a Malaysian terrorist organization raiding cargo vessels in the straits of Malacca during the 21st century? An Ionian raiding venetian ships in the early 13th century, before the forming of the Hanseatic league? Perhaps the more typical example of a privateer/pirate at the turn of the 18th century would be the most typical image envisioned - a cutlass and pistol wielding, wild, hairy, man, with no armor and a bold and swaggering demeanor.

Similar problems face the question of the ninja's skills, the tradition of ninja continuing even to this day. However, it is clear that the ninja of the intrigues of feudal Japan is the most commonly invoked theme - modern military ninjas such as those seen in universally acclaimed "American Ninja II: The Confrontation" starring Michael Dudikoff notwithstanding.

These questions are of ultimate importance. For example, while a 21st century terrorist pirate trained in high-level special operations at the U.S. School of the Americas would clearly exhibit very similar training and skills to the feudal Japanese ninja, both being trained for notably similar types of missions and environments, the terrorist pirate would have a clear advantage in equipment, with benefits such as modern lightweight armor, night-vision goggles, long range sniping carbine rifles, advanced surveillance and communications equipment, and powerful remotely-detonated explosive devices. Even so, if a feudal ninja were able to quickly close and get the drop on the 21st century pirate using stealth tactics, there is still a chance that he could come out on top. Such high variability in the encounter is a clear indication that this very discussion is somewhat pointless to discuss. For now, we shall stick to the swaggering pirate of the early 18th century and the feudal medieval ninja.

The pirate's primary advantage seems at first to be his pistol, which a feudal ninja would have little counter for aside from his excellent agility and acrobatics should he be caught in it's path. The ninja, on the other hand, has access to a wide variety of specialty equipment that is quite deadly in a wide variety of unexpected ways. In the end, the question of equipment is a wash.

There is another advantage though, considering that the psychological state of combat can potentially overshadow questions of equipment and possibly even training. The pirates main weapon is not a temporal one, but an emotional one. A pirate defeats his enemies with fear inspiring tactics long before the battle is joined. Should he fail to inspire fear, he may find himself quite in peril. The pirate must at all times give the impression that he has nothing to lose, and everything to gain, as opposed to his opponents, who have the opposite.

The ninja, on the other hand, relies on leaving no impression at all - researching his targets and slipping in and out without ever being detected. This gives the psychological advantage to the pirate, who may intimidate the ninja (who will assuredly study his target closely and thus be easy prey to tactics of misinformation) without any intimidation in return.

Training, however, is where the ninja has the clear advantage. A pirate is likely from the lower classes, and lacking formal training thus relies on numbers, fear, and sheer brutality to be effective. The ninja, on the other hand, is a highly trained killing machine on par with the best special operations soldiers through history. The ninja wins this contest hands down.

In summation, this whole discussion is rather pointless as too many variables render the discussion an excercise in rampant speculation. That said, the ninja would probably sneak in during the night with his super-stealth sampan, slit the throats of all the pirates while they are in the heavy sleep of a grog-induced torpor, and slip back out, leaving a hulking ghost ship filled with dead pirates to float into Port Royal on a foggy night, bringing along with it the great mystery of who could possibly have accomplished such an amazing feat. The shock of the deed would run electric through the streets and pirates everywhere would live in fear of the ghostly killer who comes in the night, ready to avenge against those who dare to break the laws of the pirate's code. DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES! ARG!!!!!

Pirates have eye patches and birght sashes and earrings. They win.

(Funny how a discussion such as this would bring me back to posting on the boards)

Ninjas play in spy movies. They are the ultimate evil guy's fodder. The defenitly win. Besides, there's way many more ninjas than pirate. Plus pirates are instict and ninjas still are. Ninjas. A fictionnal character will always beat the crap out of historical ones since get get hit points by the ton.

Hmmm....

Ninjas get to do all sorts of cool super-human powers and commit atrocities without repercussions (as long as the don't violate the super-secret ninja-honor-code). Plus, they get to use a variation of the Katana that's so cool, it's not even curved. Also, they use the nifty throwing stars and the hollowed-out-egg smoke grenade. Finally, they get to wear nifty outfits, and since black goes with everything, they're always in style.

Pirates, OTOH, get to play with REAL explosives (gunpowder, canons, pistols). They have an ultra-cool, yet easy to remember vocabulary "AARRRGGHH". They get to make people who annoy them walk the plank. Finally, they get to meet women with large bosoms (hey, at least in Hollywood).

Hmmm...with the bosoms (AARRGGHH!) and the explosives, I prefer pirates (as "sex and violence" beats "dark and psychotic" in my book) ;)

Steve

P.S. Hope I didn't offend anyone.

Alright people.. Some of these posts are beginning to sound suspiciously serious. Knock it off.

::grin::

The real winner in a fight like this, of course, is the American Viewing Public (and all the rest of youse guys, too, I guess)

Alright, cut it out.

Jake