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275647 Posts in 27717 Topics by 4285 Members Latest Member: - Jason DAngelo Most online today: 88 - most online ever: 565 (October 17, 2020, 02:08:06 PM)
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Author Topic: Cedar Hollow  (Read 2041 times)
Jeremiah Lahnum

Posts: 16

« on: July 20, 2006, 11:54:04 AM »

Hey all, this is my second attempt at town creation.  I posted a town a while ago that was majorly flawed, and unworkable.  I got some good feedback on it, and I meant to try and fix what I had originally done.  However, things got busy for me and I never got back to it.  On second thought I scrapped the original town and started over anyway.

I wanted to take this town all the way to hate and murder, but I realized that after Demonic Attacks, there was so much going on, that the town didn't need to go further.  I think there should be no doubt amongst the Dogs that this town is seriously messed up.  I think if I pushed it further the town might get a little too busy.  I think though there's a chance for the Dogs to revisit this town later and maybe deal with a more advanced hierarchy of sins at that point. 

The boxing idea I was unsure of.  I've recently gotten interested in boxing, and thought it would be neat to try and launch a town around the idea of old school bare knuckles fights taking place.  Nothing in the book says that this is against the faith, especially if the Steward is actively keeping the bad stuff out.  However, as you'll see in the end it turns out to be the root of the problem.  I should also note that I see these as very informal, amateur bare knuckle fights between the men at the lumber camp and some of the town men.  It's not really a league, but there's local prestige on the line. 

As the town progressed, it really moved away from the boxing idea as the main focus other than what drove the pride which set up the injustice, which lead to the sin, which brought on demonic attacks. 

Anyway, with that lead up, I'll post the town. 
Jeremiah Lahnum

Posts: 16

« Reply #1 on: July 20, 2006, 11:56:07 AM »

Here's the town write up:


Cedar Hollow


Cedar Hollow is a small lumber community situated at the edge of a great forest.  There is usually a larger outlying population of lumberjacks that uses the town as a base of its operations.  Although a great portion of the actual citizens of Cedar Hollow are faithful, the lumberjacks tend to be a mixed bag.  Overall, there tend to be more faithful than non-faithful in the area, but the heads of the lumber operations are not faithful.  Likewise the doctor who has set up a practice in Cedar Hollow to treat lumbering related injuries and serve the regular population is not faithful either. 
Despite the potential problems stemming from contact with the unfaithful, Steward Jonas has done a good job of keeping his flock to the tenets of the faith and has had few problems up until now.
When the lumber camp was founded on the edges of Cedar Hollow some of the local lumberjacks introduced boxing to the citizens of the town.  They would typically do this to blow off steam, and it was incredibly popular with many of the people.  Although the Steward was at first doubtful, after watching a few matches, he himself came to enjoy the sport.  After a year, he gave the okay for some of the local boys to get involved in the boxing matches as well, providing they happen on his terms.  (No drinking or gambling allowed.) 


Brother Isaiah is a good boxer.  He has yet to lose, and has attained a small level of fame amongst the townspeople and lumberjacks for his fighting prowess.  This rush of fame is going to his head.  He has a small clique of adoring cronies who do everything for him.  His daily chores are done for him, he always has the best seat at worship, and has recently been betrothed to Sister Susan, the most beautiful girl in town. 


Sister Susan was betrothed to Brother Abel until recently.  She loved him and he was a good man who could provide for her.  However, her parents have broken off the betrothal and instead offered her up to Brother Isaiah due to their desire to ride his fame to increase their personal status.


Sister Susan and Brother Abel are not happy with her parentís decision.  They began meeting secretly, and professing their commitment to defying her parents and their pronouncement.  Brother Abel decided one night to push for a firm commitment to their defiance.  He wanted Susan to sleep with him, and therefore consummate the marriage they never had while denying Isaiah and her parents of her virginity.  Susan was horrified that Abel would suggest this, and told him they should stop meeting.  Stung by her sudden rejection and suspicious that it indicated that she was starting to accept her betrothal to Isaiah, Abel forced the issue and took from her what he wanted. 

Demonic Attacks:

Sister Susan is recently pregnant.  The pregnancy has caused problems to say the least.  Her parents are outraged, and suspicious that this was not the result of a violent attack like Susan claims.  They think that the act was consensual and her cry of rape is a way of covering her own sin. 

Isaiah is disgusted that his bride to be has been taken from him in this fashion.  He plans on publicly denouncing her and Abel as sinners.  He's even thought of confronting Abel on his own and beating his own form of vengeance out of him.

Meanwhile, Abel has fled deep into the forest, and despite several efforts to find him, no one has been able to yet. 

 The town in general is outraged about the pregnancy and how it has hurt Isaiah.  They donít care whether it was forced or consensual, but they want blood over this, to satisfy the hurt caused to their champion.  If they could find Abel or could get their hands on Susan away from the doctor and steward, either of them could end up on the receiving end of mob justice.   

Unknown to any but Doctor Willings, the Steward, and Susan, the baby is not natural.  Already her stomach has swollen to unnatural size.  The Doctor fears she is coming to term and she has only been pregnant for three months.  Also, as the child grows, Susan gets weaker, she is pale and feverish most of the time.  The Doctor has taken her in as her parents have thrown her out. 

Brother Jonas knows that Abel raped Susan, but he wants to speak with Abel himself for fear of unleashing the town upon him.  He now realizes that the stem of this problem is the cult of personality worship that is growing up around Isaiah.  He feels it was wrong to allow the betrothal to be broken, and blames himself rather than Abel for all of this.  He feels that with his intervention, he could fix the situation and bring Abel and Susan back together.

However, he also fears that the child is a demon, and that the only way to defeat it before it comes to term is to kill the mother.  Right now Brother Jonas is praying that some Dogs come to help him out.   

The doctor meanwhile hopes to save the mother.  He feels that the baby even if born would be a deformed and crippled creature and would rather save the mother and spare the child a lifetime of misery.  However, he has not been so brazen as to recommend an abortion to these folks.  Given the opportunity, he may attempt to do just that if the Steward is away or if Susan goes into labor. 

Characters and What They Want:

Brother Jonas, Town Steward:  Brother Jonas wants the Dogs to bail him out and take the tough decisions out of his hands so he can avoid the moral quandary he is in.  He also wants them to reaffirm that he is a good man, and that this is not all his fault. 

Doctor Willings, Town Doctor: Doctor Willings wants the Dogs to keep Susan safe long enough for him to abort her unborn child and save her life.  He also wants them to get the Steward away from him long enough for this to happen.  He's fairly confident that he can save her given the chance. 

Sister Susan, Victim: Sister Susan wants the Dogs to help her.  She's sick and she knows she's dying.  However, she wants her child to live, and doesn't want anyone to take it from her.  Even though it's the product of a terrible union, it's still hers, and it still comes from Abel whom she loves. 

Brother Abel, Rapist and Fugitive: Brother Abel wants the Dogs to leave him alone.  He's depressed, angry, and damn near insane with grief over what he did.  He wants a chance to die on his own terms, he just hasn't decided if he's going to kill himself or to let the townsfolk do it for him.  He's hiding deep in a cave out in the woods and has been stealing food from the Lumber Camp at night. 

Brother Isaiah, Town Champion: Brother Isaiah wants the Dogs to compensate him for the loss of his bride to be and her pureness.  He wants them to give him another wife and to levy punishment against Abel, Susan and her family.  He also wants the child to die, as it stands as an affront to him.  He has become crazed with pride and feels that the Dogs should do his bidding like everyone else in town.  He's willing to push this by beating one of them to to assert his dominance if necessary.

Brother Malachi and Sister Wilhemina, Susan's Parents: Susan's parents want the Dogs to get Susan to confess to breaking her betrothal oath and to have them punish her for going against their will.  They also want Abel brought to justice for much the same reasons. 

The Demons: The demons want the child to be born, and for it to cause fear and rage amongst the people.  They want the child to die for the sins of its father, and for the townspeople to start a killing frenzy of all those involved in the birth of the child.  Abel, Susan (If she lives through the pregnancy.), Doctor Willings, even Steward Jonas are prime targets.  After those deaths, fingers could be pointed deeper and deeper until everyone in the town is turning against one another and senseless killing breaks out. 

What Would Happen if the Dogs Never Came: 

Eventually, the child would be born despite the best efforts of the Doctor to prevent it.  The townspeople would call for the blood of all involved in the birth of the child and accuse the Doctor, Abel, Susan and Steward Jonas of purposefully arranging for the birth of a demon child.  At the head of the pack would be Brother Isaiah who would come to feel his position of influence in the town has given him the right to overthrow the Steward.  With Isaiah leading, all of the principles involved would be beaten to death in the streets. 

After the original deaths, the mob, mad with violence would seek new targets. Things would erupt into an ever-growing spiral of finger pointing and senseless killing. 
Bret Gillan

Posts: 375

That's Bret with one 't' damn it.

« Reply #2 on: July 20, 2006, 12:05:22 PM »

Two suggestions:

I think Abel should want the dogs to forgive him.

And the Dogs having to deliver the baby (should the story go in that direction) would be intense.
Jeremiah Lahnum

Posts: 16

« Reply #3 on: July 20, 2006, 12:16:55 PM »

I like the suggestion about Abel.  I left him kind of hanging out there, and unless the Dogs specifically decide to go looking for him, they may never know what's going on with him.  This way, he may try and seek them out, in hope that they'll either forgive him or at the least punish him for what he did.  Good idea. 

Yes, the Dogs delivering the baby would be sweet, especially if none of them knows much about midwifery or medicine. 
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