Lady Elaine Fairchilde: Hot Or Not?

[Walt Freitag]

OK, I was trying to come up with the least Forge-like topics I could think of. This was number -- well, actually, it was about number 158 on the list. But it's the highest one on the list that I'm actually willing to post.

Let's look at the evidence from all sides.

NOT:

- Uncertain age.

- Only about 14" tall.

- Facial features and hairstyle not very attractive.

HOT:

- Independent means.

- Activism in defending her rights against pompous authority figures.

- Has her own museum for christssake.

- And the museum spins around! Apart from a few restaurants-on-a-stick sprinkled across the contintents, rotating buildings are few and far between and a rotating museum is just too cool.

- Worldly and uninhibited, probably has a B&D dungeon-go-round in the basement, and yet shows occasional flashes of endearing child-like naivete.

- Has little secret door at waist height to pop out of unexpectedly.

AMBIGUOUS:

- Has magic boomerang.

- Red nose, which is a minus to appearance but might indicate a willingness to party.

- Clothing not attractive, but may be deceptively concealing good figure.

- May be gay, according to some.

MY CONCLUSION (YMMV):

Definitely hot. A woman with no inhibitions who owns her own museum (not just, she's the curator or the head of the board of trustees or something; it's frigging hers). Sure, pretty faces or supermodel figures might be nice while they last, but give me a broad who can rock my world in a museum-go-round and I'm set for a lifetime.

- Walt

[C. Edwards]

If she can use her influence to bag me a job as the trolley driver then I'm all hers.  Having that Julie Andrews thing going on doesn't hurt either.  Le Purrrr....



-Chris

[Mike Holmes]

OK, as a father of a two-year old who is an avid fan of Mr. Roger's Neighborhood, I've gotten more than my fair share of Lady Elaine, of late.

And I gotta tell ya, she's just hideous. Moreso than I even remember from childhood where I probably had less pretense, and certainly no opinion on the appearances of women.

And the appearance is made all the worse by the fact that she's obviously one of the many characters puppeteered by Fred himself, who does a terrible female voice.

But the clincher has got to be the fact that she's cast as the villain. And in a kid's show, that can only mean one thing. She's petty, mean, and vindictive. Basically an object lesson in how not to behave for small kids.

I just can't find that attractive, Museum or no.

Mike

[Walt Freitag]

Hmm, very different recollections from me. I was mostly exposed to the show in the early to mid 70s which partly coincided with my early teen years. My twin brother, who is mentally retarded, watched the show daily, and also met Fred Rogers in person several times. Lady Elaine was a trouble-maker but not by any stretch a villain. Often inconsiderate, but not vindictive. The closest to a villain (though also far from it, really) was my namesake the King. He'd over-react to events by issuing decrees, like if someone got a paper cut he'd ban all paper in the Neighborhood. Lady Elaine was usually the only one to actively resist this totalitarian tyranny.

Different times, I guess.

And different ages. No surprise, I guess, that I saw Fairchilde as an adult who was being expected to behave as a small kid should.

As for the voice... whatever. Fred Rogers was one of the greatest religious humanists of our time. He was not one of the greatest puppeteers.

- Walt

[Mike Holmes]

Wow, you took that waaaay too seriously, Walt. I thought this was all in jest.

Or is this one of those things where you're trying to sucker me into feeling bad about what I said, just so you can then say, "Gotcha!"

BTW, I watched the show as a child, and always thought that Lady Elaine was the villain then, too. Maybe villain is too strong. She's the one that object lessons are taught about when it comes to transacting nicely with people. Where as King Friday is the one that object lessons about abuse of authority, or just being overbearing come from. Daniel is about being too shy. Etc.

See, now you got me being all serious about a show aimed at tots, damnit!

Mike

[Ron Edwards]

Wotta pair of eggheads.

We're talking about whether she's HOT, dammit! You two weighed in, so let's hear from others!

Um, I can't even remember what she looked like or anything, so I can't say.

Best,
Ron

[xiombarg]

Well, as long as we're being serious about non-serious things, to engage in a random topic drift normally verboten on the Forge:

I've always found it interesting that the characters in Gilligan's Island map onto the Seven Deadly Sins. In fact, I'm ashamed to admit that's how I remember the Seven Deadlies.

Gilligan = Sloth
The Skipper = Wrath
Mr. Howe = Avarice (Greed)
Mrs. Howe = Gluttony
Ginger = Lust
Mary Ann = Envy
The Professor = Pride

Also, I find it interesting that the Gilligan's Island theme song can be sung to the tune of Amazing Grace, and vice-versa...

[Mike Holmes]

http://pbskids.org/rogers/make_believe/lady_char.htm

For Ron who can't remember, there's a drawing of her. I suppose that Walt will claim that it doesn't do her justice. But the reality is even more hideous.

And the page states that she is generally the "mischief-maker".

Mike

[Anonymous]

Mythos/archetype breakdown:

Lady Elaine = mischief-maker
Mischief-maker = Coyote/Puck
Coyote/Puck = Hot (aside:  I have a personal weakness for tricksters, I guess - this is the flaw in the premise)

Therefore
Lady Elaine = Hot

For reference, I'm a mother of a 6-year-old and a child of the 70's.

[Julie]

By the way, that above was me.  I forgot to log in.

[Walt Freitag]

Uh, sorry Mike, wasn't going for the "Gotcha!" but wasn't being really serious either. (Um, except about my estimation of Fred Rogers.) Just trying to sort out the villain thing.

Not that villains can't be hot, of course. (Dark Phoenix can destroy my planet any time she wants.)

The cartoon image is way hideous compared to the real thing. Here's a (small) photo: http://www.misterrogers.org/mister_rogers_neighborhood/cast_puppet.asp#ladyelainefairchilde

- Walt

[lumpley]

Okay, now this is really so awful that I'm gonna write it in white.  Probably it'll be better for all of us if you don't highlight it.

EDIT: Curses! I got a dark background!

I tried.

My friend Barry got me hooked on a game he called "signal the sniper," to be played while watching commercial television.  The rules are, when the tv's irritating, pretend that you can signal a sniper to start shooting at the people who're on.  It's big, big fun, imagining like Fox Mulder (this was that long ago) doing his fucking Fox Mulder thing and then BAM! he's down and BAM! shoot him again while he's trying to make the scant cover at the edge of the set.  I like really violent movies so it was easy for me and satisfyingly graphic.

So then I had a kid, right, and he liked Sesame Street, which was fine, until the last seven minutes of every episode.  You parents know what I'm talking about.  Elmo's World.  La la la la, la la la la, Elmo's World!  God.  Damn.  It.  ELMO!

So I'd play signal the sniper.  "Elmo wonders how to put on a jacket!  Elmo knows, let's ask --" BAM! and the muppeteer jumps up, screaming.  "My hand, my hand! Oh god my hand!"

I guess Lady Elaine's hot, if you're into being jerked off by Mr. Rogers.

I'm ashamed. I'm covering my face. I'm sorry, Walt, especially. Maybe I'll log out and post this as a guest...

-Vincent

[Mike Holmes]

Vincent, you are one sick bastard. Thanks for making my point.

Mike

[Walt Freitag]

Hah! Having trouble distinguishing between player and character, are we? I'd send both of you off to read some articles, but that's too basic for there even to be an article about it...

- W

[Mike Holmes]

OK, Walt, let's assume that we only look at the character.

14" tall

What does that say about your predilections?

Not hot.

Mike