Critique my Exemplar!

[Matthew Glover]

Oh, sure, I'm just suggesting alternate free conflicts to get feedback on various approaches.

[Matthew Glover]

Thomas Mercenary, product of a government experiment in tapping into psionic potential.  Left The Project on bad terms.

Exemplar:
Justice - Marilyn Green, another Project refugee.  "The things done to Marilyn at The Project were terrible, but I can't justify the violence she advocates now."
Free Conflict - Goal: Someone involved with the Project is killed.
Free Conflict - Event: Marilyn's anger triggers her powers uncontrollably.
Free Conflict - Goal: Calm down Marilyn before someone gets hurt.

[drnuncheon]

Power - Agent Seymour Roth, assigned to convince Thomas to return to The Project.  "Agent Roth has the information I need to understand my abilities, but wants me under the Project's control."

This is asomewhat similar to the Power exemplar for my character (his demonic father), so I'm looking for something similar.

Event: Roth offers Thomas a deal.

Open-ended enough to (hopefully) create fighting for control.  And yet it seems so innocent on the surface.

[Matthew Glover]

This is asomewhat similar to the Power exemplar for my character (his demonic father), so I'm looking for something similar.

Event: Roth offers Thomas a deal.

Open-ended enough to (hopefully) create fighting for control.  And yet it seems so innocent on the surface.

Yes, that's exactly the sort of relationship that I meant.  Paternal, yet vaguely menacing.  Offering power, but at the cost of control.  If I play Thomas, I'll probably use your event.

[TonyLB]

See, I'd emphasize the events much less and the goals much more.  I think they lend character to the people involved:

Sally:  Goal:  Create justice within the law

Suzie:  Goal:  Max convinces Suzie he's sincere in his love (alternately "Suzie convinces herself Max isn't sincere in his love" ... very different, but also cool)

Sam:  Goal:  Max doesn't have to lie to Sam (yeah, that one's gold ... stick with it)

Marilyn:  Goal:  Flip out and kill people

Roth:  Goal:  Roth convinces Thomas to accept the deal he's offering

[Matthew Glover]

When I went to bed last night, I was all "I totally don't get what you're saying about Goals over events," but when I woke up this morning it was crystal clear.  Yeah, I think I can see what you mean. 

Okay, new page.

Jerry Meyers (aka Supersonic), a teenage Speedster/Spunky Kid who can make it across town to stop a bank robbery and be back before the tardy bell for fourth period Trig class, but can't find the time to do his homework.

Duty Exemplar - Mrs. Stanwick, the Social Studies teacher.  "Mrs. Stanwick is always riding me about living up to my potential, but I can't tell her that's what I'm trying to do."   (I'm pretty satisfied with this. It feels strong.)
Free Conflict ideas:

Goal: Find some time to do my schoolwork.
Goal: Guilt Jerry for neglecting his schoolwork.  Both of these seem weak.

Goal: Make Mrs. Stanwick proud of me.  This seems pretty good.

Goal: Prevent Jerry from doing superhero stuff.  Okay, this is one interesting.  Mrs. Stanwick doesn't know that Jerry's a superhero.  She doesn't know that she's trying to accomplish this goal.  She thinks she's just trying to get him to study for a test or fill out college applications, but all that will stop him from superheroing.  However, this is a weak goal because while it's in play it doesn't stop Jerry.  I think it'd be better done as Goal: Do superhero stuff.

[TonyLB]

I like the "Proud of me" one.  I'll also point out the far more depressing flip-side:

Goal:  Don't disappoint Mrs. Stanwick.

You get a strong set up for the "Do I go stop the bank robbery, and disappoint Mrs. Stanwick by cutting class?" dilemma.

[Matthew Glover]

Ah, I like "Don't disappoint" too. 

I'd really like to see some exemplar examples (examplars? :D) from other people, especially ones that you found to work well.  Does anybody have some good ones to show off?

[TonyLB]

Here's the Exemplar Network from Proton High School, a teen-heroes game I ran.  It's deliberately pretty tangled:

Jenny Swift:  Shallow teen speedster
Horatio Hiss:  Budding supervillain
Jack Quinn:  Sterling citizen, student body president, invulnerable, super-strong, nice-guy, pushover
Molly Sykes:  Goth psyche-vampire

Jenny-Horatio:  Goal:  Jenny does something Horatio thinks is cool
Molly-Horatio:  Goal:  Horatio notices Molly exists
Horatio-Jack:  Goal:  Humiliate Jack Quinn
Jenny-Jack:  Goal:  Drive Jack to make a forceful decision
Jack-Molly:  Goal:  Help Molly live up to her potential
Jenny-Molly:  Goal:  Reveal hidden depth in Jenny's thoughts

[Matthew Glover]

Ah, nice.  These are really interesting.

Jenny-Molly:  Goal:  Reveal hidden depth in Jenny's thoughts

Could you elaborate on this one?  Is this a goal for Jenny or for Molly?  What was the Drive and the conflict?

[TonyLB]

Well, it never really got run in play (I've only run Proton High the once ... it needs a severe retune before it makes a return visit) and it didn't come up ... so in practical terms, it's never been played.

In hypothetical, I had it as hanging off of Molly's Despair Drive ... she was bound and determined to show that even a perky pep-squad girl like Jenny Swift actually had deep thoughts about suicide and darkness and evil.  Whereas Jenny (again, in my mind) would protest "Nope!  I really am this shallow, and proud of it!"

[Matthew Glover]

Ah, I see.  That's a really interesting relationship. 

Here's a new one:

The Mentor, a Mind Reader/Puppet Master.  One of the professors at Evil University, head of the graduate program.  Uses grad students as minions in his nefarious side-projects.  I'm imagining using a slightly modified Mook/Sycophant to represent a bunch of generic fratboy thugs.  The Mentor usually goes through minions like kleenex, but he's reluctant to do so with...

Power Exemplar - Chipwell Vanderbilt "Chip" Thoroughfaire IV, one of the Mentor's students.  "I think Chip has serious potential, but if I don't watch out he'll turn on me."

Free Conflict ideas:

Goal: Show him that he can't get along without me.
I really like that this one can be a goal for either character.  The Mentor uses it to bind Chip to him so that Chip doesn't betray him or overthrow him.  Chip uses it so the Mentor doesn't get him killed.

Goal: Betray the Mentor.
I like this one very much.  It's kinda menacing.

Goal: Goad Chip into making a mistake.
Man, this whole relationship is really terrible.  I may actually play this so I can see how it goes.

[TonyLB]

I do love me my master-minion relationships.  For Chip and his mentor I'd lean toward "Goal:  Establish Trust."  It's nice and vague, and 90% of the meaning gets written in when people use the Inspirations from it later.  Does the trust between mentor and Chip allow them to work together to ward off their enemies?  Or does Chip use his mentor's trust in order to betray him?

[Matthew Glover]

Ahhhhh.  See, there's a little trick of reversal about some of these that I just haven't gotten yet. 

[Matthew Glover]

Because I was so pleased with the way they turned out, I've written up Max Millions and Sam, Thomas Mercenary and Agent Roth, and The Mentor and Chip.  I hope to get at least a couple of them in play this weekend.

I'd still like to hear from folks about their experiences (positive and negative) with Exemplars so I can hopefully learn by example.